What Would Happen
by SilverGuy11
Summary: Have you ever wondered what would happen if events in games or characters were completely different? Well, here's your answer. Everything from if Sonic could Spin Dash in Sonic 1 to Link actually talking will be covered. Chapter 2 is up.
1. Tails Ain't a Pansy No More

**What If?  
**  
Me: Hello peoples. I'm silverguy11, and today, I shall present you with some of our most burning video game questions.

Tezaki(T): With every game that's out there, mostly in the Sonicverse, there must be an alternate reality if a situation came out differently than in the game.

Sonic: such as, "What would happen if Sonic could Spin Dash in Sonic 1?"

Me: that's what this somewhat short fic will basically be about. So enjoy!

* * *

The morning had just started. Small rays of sunshine were seeping in through the windows onto Tails' head as he was sleeping on his desk. Over the past 52 hours straight, Tails has been working on a machine that can give the exact outcome of what would happen in a specific scenario in full 1080p HD clarity. He even managed to fit in a 52 inch display on it. The yellow orange fox slowly woke up, looking at his marvelous invention.

Sonic was the first one down the stairs, getting ready for his morning jog around the planet. He was about to step out the door, until the sight of Tails looking at something caught his attention. Sonic walked over to where Tails was sitting. The sight of a 52'' TV instantly made Sonic forget about his jog.

"So…what's this thing ya got here, genius?" Sonic asked.

"You remember on Futurama when Professor Farnsworth made that What If Machine?" Tails asked.

"Yeah. But what's that gotta do wit--oh." Sonic flatly said. "Does it work?"

"Let's find out. Ask a question, and you'll get an answer in full 1080p resolution."  
"Sweet. Uh…I got it!" Sonic exclaimed aloud. "What if Tails was an actual threat to Sonic?"

Tails was somewhat annoyed at Sonic's question, but he quickly dismissed it. On the screen, these words showed up…in HIGH DEFINITION:

_First Scenario: _What if Tails was an actual threat to Sonic?

After a few seconds of processing, a video clip/movie began to play.

One random day, Sonic and Tails were sitting around Tails' workshop playing Mortal Kombat Deadly Alliance. They were tied with 9 wins apiece. Whoever lost the next match would have to ask Amy out on a date in nothing but a Speedo.

"Good luck surviving on your date with Ames tonight, Tails," Sonic taunted. "Ya want me to give you a four leaf clover or something?"

"You seem confident in your abilities, Sonic," Tails answered.

"After I've dominated nine wins in a row, why wouldn't I be?"

_Why do I even bother trying to talk to him, _Tails thought to himself as he selected Scorpion. _Has he really forgotten that easily that we're _tied _with nine wins? The only reason why he even _has _nine wins is because I went to the store to buy cookies and he unpaused the game and killed me nine times. I doubt even Knuckles is this retarded. _

Sonic picked Kenshi, amazed at his red blindfold. Tails, being player one, pressed START and started the match. A moment of silence passed between the two, with only the sound of the Nintendo Gamecube reading the disc disrupting the delicate balance of the otherwise silent atmosphere.

3.., 2.., 1...GO!

And as quickly as it began, Tails finished the match with extreme swiftness, stringing together several combos he memorized the night before. Scorpion's signature fatality was displayed on the screen. He took off his mask to reveal a skull for a face and blew fire at Kenshi, burning him alive and causing him to explode.

"Well, Sonic. It seems that your fantasy is about to come true: a date with Amy," Tails said with a naughty smirk on his face.

"What are you talking about?" Sonic asked.

"I won, you lost. I pwned you, you suck hairy donkey balls. Get the fuck used to it."

"Still no idea what you're talking about."

"WTF, man?!" Tails exclaimed through clenched teeth. In the past, he had been used to Sonic's stupid decisions and lifestyle. Tails even went as far to put up with the time Sonic asked where the toilet paper was in the grocery store when he was standing 2 feet from it. But this…this is too much for little Tails to handle.

"WE _JUST _DISCUSSED THIS 3 FRICKIN' MINUTES AGO! WHOEVER LOST THE NEXT MATCH HAD TO GO ON A DATE WITH AMY IN A SPEEDO! I WON, YOU DIDN'T! THAT MEANS _YOU_, MISTER, ARE GOING TO PUT ON A SPEEDO AND GO TO AMY'S HOUSE RIGHT NOW AND ASK HER OUT!!" Tails yelled at Sonic, in an explosion of anger that could be heard within a 3 block radius.

"I still don't get what you're talkin' about, Tails," Sonic said calmly, despite what just happened.

"Why don't you explain it to me, 'cause I'm seriously not getting this."

"It's simple, really. I switched the controllers," Sonic said.

"W-WHAT!?!?!?" Tails said in a Lil Jon like voice.

Some random person outside Tails' window responded with "OoKkAAY!!!"

"Shut da hell up!" Tails responded. "Now do you mean to tell me that you think you're getting out of this because you switched some controllers around? I don't think so, bub."

"I have to disagree. You said that when we first started playing that you would win with your special controller, not the plain one you were using just now. Even though I lost, _you_ didn't adhere to your own guidelines. And because of this, neither of us won legitimately, thus making the bet null and void." Sonic said, quite professionally.

Tails' mouth was completely open, like the times in old cartoons when the mouths touched the floor even though that's physically impossible. He was surprised and somewhat scared at how Sonic was not only right, but he actually used a word that had more than 9 letters. For a while, Tails just stood there, silent, completely unmoving. After how Sonic's been acting so far, anyone would be.

However, this didn't last for very long. Tails slowly made a fist, first with one fist and then the other. His entire light orangey face turned red, followed by a really big monobrow that appeared to have cut his face in half form over his eyes. The last phase in this situation was spontaneously pulling out a loaded M-16 about 2 mm from Sonic's eye.

" I don't give two shits if I didn't use the controller I said I would! You're going on that date whether you like it or not! At least you will if you value your life…" Tails said.

"Heh…And you have the nerve to call _me _a retard. Have you forgotten we're in a Sonic game universe? I'll just lose all of my rings. Sonic explained coolly. "Besides, it doesn't matter if I die. I have, like, 57 lives."

Just then, Tails remembered something. In every Sonic console game ever made (except for Sonic and the Secret Rings), a life counter at the bottom left corner of the screen shows the main character's lives. Tails took a look at Sonic's, seeing that Sonic really did have 57 lives.

_I wonder…_he thought. Tails pointed the M-16 at Sonic's life counter and shot 57 bullets at it, reducing Sonic's lives to 0. Now Sonic could only die one more time until he had to reset his life from the last save point: a dream about him being married to Big.

"How about now, punk?" Tails asked in a gruff-like voice.

"Alright, alright," Sonic said, seemingly admitting defeat. "Let me just go get my--HAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

While walking toward the closet to supposedly find a Speedo, Sonic quickly sped back to Tails and tried to kick the gun out of his hands. Except for one thing: Sonic, being a total dumbass, reverted to a slow motion moment right before he kicked the gun away. Tails easily stepped out of the way, while Sonic was stuck there, slowly kicking the position where Tails previously stood. One minute later, Sonic was back in normal motion, flying through the air and crashing into the roof, then falling down to the carpeted floor.

"Nice try, but now I'm definitely going to shoot the first blue hedgehog I see not wearing a Speedo with chocolate and flowers in the next five minutes." Tails threatened.

Sonic sped to the nearest chocolate and floral shop, stealing a box of Reese's and some carnations, but no one noticed because he was moving so fast. He decided to get some movie tickets to "I Think I Love My Wife" while he was out. Sonic lost track of time after leaving the house, so he kicked it into high gear and reached the workshop door. When he opened it, Tails was counting.

"4..,3..,2..--"

Tails stopped counting. "Good hedgehog. Now go put on your Speedo and go to Amy's house before I get the taser."

THE END

"Wow, uh, just wow. I could actually see that happening," Sonic said, completely shocked at what he just saw. "Except for the whole me-dating-Amy thing…'cause that would never happen in a million trillion years."

Sonic felt a light tap on his shoulder. He considered the possibilities: 1) Shadow, coming to kill him for being a faker, 2) Big, coming to ask when the wedding was and Sonic realizing that wasn't a dream, or 3) Amy coming to kick his ass because she heard what he said. In a motion that took a whole five seconds, Sonic turned his head to look over his shoulder. One of the first things he saw was a big yellow thingy that pretty much blocked his view. Tails walked over to Sonic to give him some advice: "You betta run, boy. Run like you ain't never ran before. And when you come back, bring some Chips Ahoy chewy cookies."

"You just _had _to ruin it, didn't you, Tails," Amy said with disappointment.

In a literal flash, Sonic was out the door with Amy close behind. Many cars were overturned on Sonic's trip to avoid the pink curtain of death that somehow was catching up to him, even while running at 650 mph. Insurance companies were sure to make a nice lump sum of cash today.

If you wanna find out what happens to the cookies (and the rest of the story), read the next chapter.

* * *

Tezaki: Uh...wow. That's all I can say.

Sonic: That's bogus, man. Why can't Tails be my lap dog?

me and T stare at Sonic

Me: WTF is wrong with you?

T: I knew you were a lame, but now you're a MJD (Michael Jackson disciple) too?

Sonic: Stop twisting my shit around, bob damn it!

Me: m'kay. Until next chapter I guess. If you have any ideas, feel free to send me a pm.

Read & review please, m'kay?


	2. Link Can Talk! not really

-1**What Would Happen?  
**

Me: Hello peoples. I'm silverguy11, and once again, I shall present you with some of our most burning video game questions.

Tezaki(T): With every game that's out there, mostly in the Sonicverse, there must be an alternate reality if a situation came out differently than in the game.

Sonic: Today's question is a very surprising one, sure to be never thought of by the general public.

Me: Relax and enjoy.

* * *

About three and a half minutes from when Amy started her globe-spanning chase after Sonic in the last chapter, a somewhat sleepy red echidna walked down the stairs to get some Cheesy Poofs. Who might this be, you ask? Knuckles, of course. It's strange for him to eat Cheesy Poofs because he eats mostly fruits and stuff, but today, Knuckles decided to try something new.

The red echidna leisurely strolled into the kitchen area, passing by Tails who was sitting on a spinny stool in front of the What If machine (in HIGH DEFINITION), and onward to Tails' secret stash of sweets. Tails was trying to think of another question to ask his invention, unaware of Knuckles' presence.

"Hmm, what should I ask. 'Will I get rich?' or 'What would happen if Sonic and Amy got married?' SO many choices…" the orange fox said while spinning around. "If only I…Hey!"

Knuckles got busted. He had trouble sneaking around the many boxes of healthy trail mix that was the decoy to Tails' secret stash. If only his hands were smaller…or if his knuckles were retractable.

'Darn it. If only my knuckles were retractable…' the red echidna thought to himself.

"C'mon, Tails. You got a freakin' grocery store of junk food back there! Can't I get at least one bag of Cheesy Poofs?" Knuckles pleaded.

"And may I ask _why _do you want Cheesy Poofs? I thought you were only into fruits and stuff." Tails said.

"Am I not allowed to try new things or something?" Knuckles replied.

"Well, yeah, but…" Tails tried to say.

"It's 'cause you're prejudiced against red echidnas with Bob Marley dreadlocks isn't it?"

"No…of course no—"

"Then let me get some Cheesy Poofs."

"Here's an idea: go pawn your Master Emerald and get your own! Rouge is just gonna steal it for the 2,000,000th time again anyway…"

"So now you think all red echidnas with Bob Marley dreads are only good at getting their Master Emeralds stolen by bats with big tits and a matching ass, is that it? I knew it, you prejudiced little assymptote!"

"Don't you mean asymptote?"

"No! Would you like it if I pawned your retarded TV sitting precariously close to the edge of the table?"

"It's a What If machine—in HIGH DEFINITION!—you dumbass."

"Really? Sweet. Can I ask a question?" Knuckles asked.

"Go ahead, _you fuckin' assymptote_." Tails said, saying the last three words to himself.

Knuckles walked over to the What If machine, taking it all in: the super big display, it's compact design…it was the perfect way to get back at Sonic for all those times he was beaten by that blue prickly pest. '_Now how can I get back at Sonic by using this thing…'_' Knuckles thought to himself. '_maybe, nah. Too obvious. Or what about if I…? No, no, no…not even I would be that cruel._' Tails was gradually becoming annoyed having to sit there and wait for Knuckles to have a train of thought, on account of the last time this happened Halloween had come by "twice" in the same year.

"Wait, why do I have to wait for someone else to ask a question? It's my machine. I can ask my own damn questions. Heck, I should be charging people to get their fortunes told with this," Tails thought aloud. "Now what to ask…hmm, yes. I do think I'll ask that after all."

"What If machine. What would happen if Link could talk in his games?" Tails asked.

After a few seconds of processing, a movie started play—what's this? The movie's not playing yet? Something's wrong here…

"Where the heck's the movie, man?! I got out buttered popcorn and everything!" Tails exclaimed. "Ohh, man…I can't charge people to get their fortunes told in high definition if a simple question like if Link could talk takes a whole minute!"

* * *

Guess you'll have to wait until the next installment if you want to see what would it be like if Link could talk. Till next chapter, fellow readers. All 1.5 of you. 


End file.
